Bittersweet Flashbacks

There are nights, such as this one, when memories flood in and fill every space in my mind. I look back and I remember how simple things were. Obviously, I thought nothing of it at the time. But, now.... it's a different story.

Along the way, such good friends have faded into oblivion. There were twists and turns that ultimately caused everything to become so... complicated. I never would have anticipated that things would have been the way they are now. There are people who I thought would still be by my side. But they're long gone. 

On the upside, there are a handful of others who now mean more to me than I could have ever imagined.

There are moments that I long to relive and there are moments that I'd rather have erased. There are friends I wouldn't trade for the world and there are people I wish I hadn't shared so many of my thoughts and my self with. There are motives that I am proud of and there are layers of resentment that put me to shame.

Down the road, I know there will be more circumstances that will test my patience, my will, my composure, and my faith. Even more unwanted memories will pile themselves atop one another day after day and year after year. But, somehow, I'm certain that everything will turn out fine.

The "Debut"

I'm going to take things a little further back by writing about my 18th birthday in the summer. It's an enormous Filipino tradition for a girl to have a debut when she turns 18. Growing up, I've never quite felt the urge to have one. However, I can't help but admire how touching every debut turns out to be. There's the tiniest twinge of longing for such a huge celebration, but it's alright.

Aside from spending time with my parents at home, I ventured out into the scorching heat with two of the closest to my heart. From cracking jokes and laughing in between bites, I must say that my little "debut" was pretty darn awesome.

Since we were at Mandarin, I was given obnoxious props as a middle-aged man with a strong Chinese accent belted out his hilarious rendition of "Happy Bursday". I ended up finishing most of the cake by myself. It was filled with jello and it was a bit peculiar and I was really, really stuffed. We all paid our bills separately and were amused by the slips of paper in the fortune cookies that were given to us. These guys didn't even pay for me. They suck.

I'm just kidding.

Even though we ate at a location that was still within the same town.. er, city, it was sad that we somehow managed to get lost. We basically walked in circles around a neighbourhood while struggling to figure out which buses were still in service on a Saturday. Of course, we failed. Hard. We spent at least half an hour waiting for a bus that (surprise!) didn't run on weekends. And then we were drenched in sweat from the merciless sun. Good stuff.

When we finally got back to Andrew's house, we whipped up some strawberry smoothies to ease the heat. And when that could not suffice, we complained endlessly about how we wish we had a swimming pool or passes to the water park at Wonderland. Eventually, we resorted to idiotically sticking our heads in the sink to soak our heads with tap water. 

Like, dang. How innovative are we? Couldn't ask for better people to make a fool out of myself with. 

Unfaltering Friendships

After three years of not seeing each other, I was reunited with one of my greatest friends: Merissa. I met up with her at UTSC and we hugged it out. Well, sort of. It was a brief hug because it was freezing outside and we were both keen on scurrying into the warmth of the buildings. But it was still filled with the bursting happiness that is expected from two long lost buds. 

We just lounged around for a while as we made unsuccessful attempts at sneakily taking a spamload of photos on her mac. We were given an ample opportunity to catch up on everything that was on our minds. It was nice. Very nice. Similar to my dear friend, I hardly get the chance to immerse in long conversations with people face to face.

Aside from pouring our thoughts out, we laughed and we reminisced about old times and we laughed some more. Up until that point, neither of us realized that we've actually been friends for around 7 or 8 years now. It's an incredible thought. It's also crazy how quickly time passes. 

Later on in the afternoon, we impulsively decided to head over to Pickering to grab some sushi. We were both hungry and suddenly craving the delicious Japanese delicacy. When we got to the sushi place, we thought it was closed. But, fortunately for us, it was open and pretty empty... meaning that the food was served to us that much more speedily! Mmm. I must say, everything was great; The service, the presentation, the taste. Everything.

After our splurge on food, we walked to the mall through the frosty air and chilly winds. We decided to buy matching shirts to relive our silliness from years and years ago. It was like no time had passed at all.

Anyway, I'm still in wonder at how tightly knit Merissa and I still are after years of infrequent contact with one another. This is one friendship that I'm positive will go the distance.

Heart of the City

Ever since I started university, I think I've roamed Downtown adventurously more than I ever have in my entire life. As sad as that may be, it's also incredibly exhilarating. Most of my time in the bustling city has been spent with my best friend since the summer before eighth grade: Andrew. Thinking about it now, I realize that I actually spent the first day of university with him right in Downtown after my one and only class on Mondays.

To this day, I'm still considerably envious of everyone who's privileged enough to be going to school in the city. It always seems like there's so much to do. Sure, there are also loads of distractions. But, in all honesty, the freedom that it's accompanied by would be beyond worth it. I'm sure that, if I ended up attending classes in UTSG, I would have found a way to work around the urban craziness and keep up with my studies.

Nonetheless, I look forward to seeing what else this wonderful city has to offer. So far, my Downtown days have been filled with book store exploration, food tasting, aimless wandering, beautiful scenery to capture, laid back conversations, and simply absorbing the surroundings. I don't get to go out quite often but, whenever I do, there is always something to appreciate.

Game Night

After what I assume was a period of four years, the cousins and I finally engaged in another epic game night. Oh, right, and this took place a month before Halloween. Half of the Herrera cousins were missing but there's always next time! The costumes for the night involved none other than the classic Egyptian theme. This was accompanied by some little Egyptian decorations here and there, and, of course, the board game that inspired it all: Amun-Ra. The learning curve was a bit more advanced than I'd expected and it ended up taking three hours for all of us to learn the logistics of the game (aka the entire time we were playing). Nonetheless, it was an interestingly amusing bonding experience.

We reverted back to the simpler grounds of Monopoly Deal afterward. Let me just tell you that when the cousins get into the game, they really get into the game. Mischievous grins, dramatic gasps, defensive (but playful) comments; the whole gaming charade. We can become quite a competitive bunch. And that's what makes it all the more enjoyable. In addition to that, it was cute seeing my cousin's dog, Bear, being transformed into an 'Egyptian' cat by some doggy bonnet. Another dog named Griffin was there, too (he's the Golden Retriever). A good part of the evening was spent having to resist their puppy dog eyes when they wanted the food we were eating. But, not to worry. We didn't give in!

I look forward to more weekends spent laughing over finger foods and board games in the near future. All credit goes to my cousin, Mia, for being so willing to put all of this together. Kudos to her.

The Beginning

Bear with me as I struggle to decipher the aspects of composition on blogspot. Anyway, I intended on starting on the first day of 2014. But, unsurprisingly, that plan went to ruins as soon as the university friends had begun to discuss the wonders of blogging. I simply couldn't resist.

I suppose I'll start this off by expressing how exhilarating the first concert for YUGC was. Ever since I finalized my timetable for the year, I haven't been able to keep my mind off gospel choir. It's such a refreshing experience. I'm not quite sure how I can use words to capture the uplifting beauty of being surrounded by incredible individuals whose raw passion and enthusiasm are infectious.

The first concert was almost a month ago and I'll never forget it. Somehow, the couple hundred of us found a way to fit onto the risers on stage. It was an evening of the soulful soloists leading an army of booming voices to musical victory. To this day, I still cannot absorb the joy we all felt.

I couldn't have been more thankful to have been able to share this first university milestone with some close friends and family. It was the first time I received flowers after a performance. Imagine that. I wasn't even one of the soloists and my friends were sweet enough to do something to make me smile endlessly. On another note, I have an amazingly thoughtful best friend. Much thanks to him for bringing up the idea.

As complicated as university is, I must say that I'm enjoying every second of it.